I Dwell in Hope

So I'm a pretty big advocate of God's perfect timing. Don't get me wrong, I know He doesn't need my approval of this character trait of His, but I think in general we spend entirely too much time telling God how we want things done on our schedules only to discover that His schedule was the right one all along. (I'm thinking Sarah and Abraham here...)

Recently, I've been...

RESTLESS. It took me a while to pin down the correct term, but I think this is it. Anyone still keeping up with this blog -bless you if you've put up with my four month absence- has read posts that come from a place of being absolutely sure about what I have to say or what I'm doing. And I think this best explains my absence, for approximately four months I've been in an unfamiliar season of the "un-sure." The next step I'm supposed to take hasn't been perfectly mapped out for me as in years past. The next goal, the next big thing, or dream, or passion, well, basically the next anything seems completely lost to me.

In my last post, I said, "so I'll go!" And this sounds exciting. And yes, I've been weighing my options on some places I could go. Distant places, think foreign. Yet, I still have felt no release in my spirit or in my mind that lead me to believe that any of those plans of mine are the proverbial "right" ones. Which is a really STRANGE place for me to find myself in. Still, I'm learning that it's ok. It's ok because the God I serve is a good dad. He told me He has a plan and you know what? I believe Him.

I happened to read through a great blog last night from one of my favorite missionary bloggers that in response to being asked what advice she would give people interested in missions, she said "Get a job!" Now to some reading this, you may think, "well duh!" After all money makes the world go round right? But for me, money has never been a stopping point on my dreams. Basically, my life where money is concerned has always looked like this: I have no none, but God will provide. So an apparently obvious answer to you, looks to me like the biggest epiphany I've had in weeks. Don't get me wrong, I have a job, but I've never looked at it from the perspective of a long term commitment to achieve the long term commitment I want to make to Christ. I hope that was clear as mud...

Basically what I'm trying to convey is that for all my big plans and dreams there is a perfect time that God has set aside where He will accomplish those things in my life. He gave Abraham the dream that his descendants would outnumber the stars he couldn't count. I don't think that my dreams are just happenstance. No I choose to believe that they are valuable and meant for a certain time under heaven. Hopefully, this restlessness won't hang on too much longer, but in the interim, God, help me to seek You out daily. Reveal to me Your plan as You see fit, not as I feebly demand it.

Thanks for putting up with me while I've been M.I.A. As a token of my appreciation, I offer this awesome Gift: (Get that play on words? If not, go back and read my older posts!! haha)

Look who graduated kindergarten and will be starting Primary 1 in January! I just wish I could have been there!